Good morning!

 Time flies, Remember the last time in here and everyone retreats, or a hot summer day. Although the weather is not very cool, but we feel the autumn chill.

Today, we know themselves with a common understanding, understanding of our world, this is the life of the Buddha gives us concern. As we just saw the second Buddhist Forum commercials, has appeared repeatedly in the film saying that It makes me think of this as we learn together how we get lucky in life

, we introduce several ways to achieve happiness pleasure of the elements of life, and he includes some correct concept, and the resulting Yanshen out of rational behavior and successful harvest.

remember the last time here to introduce a Jiyu: 
precepts and language we made a presentation, do not know the impression we are not there.

If we can not establish and regulate their own rule of life, language and behavior from some of their constraints and management, it is difficult to ensure that they are not hurt by their own words and deeds. Please note that we're talking

Today we're introducing the theme of It can be said, when you reborn into the arms of his mother, this relationship has been formed. It is very simple to read four sentences, relevant for the parents, the relationship between the wife and children, including our occupation in the world, if we can have done in these areas such as law, or relatively decent, properly,UGG boots, that is our happiness indispensable part of life.

do not know if you have not noticed, in this world, we are all living in social relations, there is no way each of us is to avoid social relations. Of course, the most basic relations, including us and our parents, we and our children, and then extended out there will be a teacher, friends, relatives, colleagues, and so the relationship.

we can well understand and parents, his wife the relationship between the terms of our life is very meaningful and valuable! Present here have not lived in such a relationship? I guess not!

I think even a monk of the monks, like us, we still have relatives lay, although the Buddhist saying that our past lives, but we have experienced. And when we have such a relationship at home, will definitely affect my life today in the Sangha, as well as fellow practitioners in and around the elders, the relationship between the masters.

Therefore, we often think a person is living in a relationship, if he does not know how to deal with and between parents, or when parents have children, he does not know how to raise children time, this time in our society there will be many problems.

is not it? ! The education of children, the elderly maintenance problems, in such a world, these issues are increasingly highlighted, we see that there are couples marital problems.

Sometimes I am also very concerned about the media, yesterday I saw a report on aging in China. Communicate with us, they also talked about. We see a data, China now has over one hundred million elderly will be close to 2020 than it is now increased by 1 million, to reach over 200 million. After 2020, almost every 10 years to over 100 million net increase to 2051, to reach over 400 million, will account for 11% of the total population at that time. That is, 10 years later, the proportion of our total population of the elderly has been accounted for in the very large.

elderly pension is to highlight the growing problem of society, but also by the relevant departments of national concern, I think this is Buddhism to be of concern. Especially for the Buddhist devotees in the home is no way to avoid problems. The one hand, his pension for the elderly, as well as on the one hand is their own future.

This is a very real problem. You can not say that these are to the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas to do it, sometimes they may not have so much energy to take care of you, ah!

Ha ha! Includes also a very practical question, you might say I'm not old. Not old as the person may be your child, you son of man, and his daughter, how do you deal with and between their parents?

When you were young may not feel anything because you are small you do not know, but when you grow up gradually, you have consciousness, and with self-after, you will think of me how to get along with their parents? I think this is a very important knowledge, very important! This is a life science.

However, in our current education seems to be no talking about this part, and in our traditional Chinese culture, there is some. For example, in the past have talked about the education of the child's request, the request of parents, two-way requirements, but now seems to have gone.

we talk about educating the children, is to give her some skills, and technology. We will see a lot of us are not satisfied, or say no recognition of the place. As the present education, whether it is higher education, or primary education, educators are inherently opposed to the last century, our country engaged in education. We were absorbed in Germany education is in the industrial revolution, a number of universities to train more technical personnel and, later, of Soviet Union, Soviet Union, Germany is also a copy, so we train students in state schools are more suitable for metropolitan cities engaged in the community some skills. The lack of our very humane care, everyone became a materialistic thing.

say that you can understand it? Do not understand, please raise their hands. Okay okay! I think you are very conscious. Ha ha! If you do not understand, that is, self-expression!

this is also engaged in education because of the recent work and some human contact, understanding a little,Bailey UGG boots, indeed, they are also exploring the city's education and rural education to do some division, because after all, his culture is different people.

but fundamentally, our culture is a person, not a substance, he would do the processing, his eyes straight Leng Leng's looking at you, make you feel his human dimension, one has some of the features.

This is an education, a pension, of course, education is fundamental, and Buddhism itself is an education. Education is of such a distress, I used the word

This of course can not blame the young people is how we like how, to criticize them. In fact, we think again, they were not at home when they are well informed, or good training, hard to generate mutual trust and security between people of such a relationship.

was too much control we have been asked, or be relied upon, so we have grown up since the development of a very difficult and very stable heterosexual relationship, or that we do not place too much wishful thinking of marriage, or because the ideal is that the whole was exhausted.

these issues in the life of the Buddha in his concern, especially for the believers at home, or have a favorable impression of Buddhism, I hope to learn from the Buddhist view of how the Buddhist world, understanding the problems of life who may wish to have a look at how Buddhism is to look at these phenomena, how to live in through our own management to achieve harmony and good fortune.

this before I make a brief introduction, then we will see, in the Buddhist scriptures in the course of a lot about the liberation or part of the monastery's monks lay at home, they will in this respect and requirements. Was common for people in India, his teachings are from his reality, starting from his life at home, let him eat a healthy and stable home life. So in his teaching tended to say that giving, precepts, in order to practice in India in the future they hope to be reborn in the Brahma. So it in such a relationship, life at home is particularly important! You have to deal with a lot of relationships.

in Buddhism, a very well-known classic, the introduction of home relations. We are The father is a thinker, he has one morning in the week against the truck on the bottom. Today, we are often in the temple you can see some of a handful of believers incense, and then there are the top four Zaibai below, and asked what he worship? He did not know, anyway, all the land, what the gods are worshiped to. I think this guy will be when the six-party idea.

When the Buddha after him, asked him: see the Buddha's compassion, he is not to say that worship is not good, he said let me tell you the meaning of worship party, which party we represent as a people, we properly handle the six-party relationship in the world.

that which we have just described to include parents, the relationship between us and our relationship with his wife, of course, talking about the relationship between the parents, there is how we treat our own children, this relationship is bi-directional The. Relationship between the two sides each have certain responsibilities and obligations. Also includes the relationship between us and the leadership of our colleagues in the relations between us and the teachers, and teachers of the relations.

At this point, we take a look at how the Buddha says in the classics as a person in a relationship, what you should do something, of course we will talk about how to treat our parents.

our structure in China today is an inverted pyramid. In the early 80s, with the implementation of the national family planning policy, led to today's urban family structure, consisting of four elderly people, two young people, there is a child component, which is a very awkward structure. So, with the transformation of such a society, we all have busy living, coupled with pressure, a few mountains in our body, including the house, medical care, etc. so, in fact, one person said there was no pressure is extraordinary, that there pressure is normal, that anxiety is normal, that anxiety is not unusual.

Alas! Sitting here, I said something like, when you feel how? How about your body?

You gave me the feeling is always good! I remember five years ago, we learn together in the Wisdom Hall, when you bring a bag, the bag says a few words amused me. He was very elderly people to rejoice. Although age is so big this year, 80 now?



remember when we first become attached to was five years ago, the winter of 2005, in Wisdom Hall, he was converted fan of Meditation. You do not know, I had never been seen badly, the audience at least once only 7. Along the way! We are very grateful to share in!

just want to ask what is it? When I say these words, your body does not feel any discomfort? We often will hear some negative information, the people are very taut, and then be stuck in these emotions. Let us not see this is only a fragment of life and a point, we will be there, that is, freeze, and understand?

the TV remote control, there is a A lot of time, we will of life to be suspended. You will find, in fact your life is flowing! Whether it is our body and mind, or the outside world, are in constant change.

However, if you are fixed in there, you will not get out, you will always put him as your all! Your life, or even two students, whose son, four students are in for such a thing. Therefore, we in the TV film will be some very interesting topics, such as:

us back to our point of real life, if we today, you are fortunate enough to be a person's son or daughter, Ha ha! Oh, you're very lucky! You can have the opportunity to get a personal, as a person's son or daughter, this is a very fortunate thing, at least show that you have a chance, you have a chance to play a role in their children. I will, and we talk about some of my experiences.

on that, I think because the traditional Chinese demanding for children, filial piety has three requirements. One is the parent body, the second is the parent's heart, the third is the wisdom of parents. We all know these three?

Ha ha! Adoptive parents themselves, that is, on the material needs of their parents give them, so they do not have to worry about living to edge. So when I see the point, I feel that today there are many in our parents, they are very old, has been the retirement age, but they'll still go hard society, also for the children in the do. In fact, I talked about here, and I felt this with the Buddhist and even with China's traditional culture is different.

parents raised us from childhood, mental and physical strength they have paid a lot. I sometimes think of as a monk, I gave my parents to provide very little on some of the material and physical help, I would feel ashamed, it inspired me to practice and will also become a driving force for the public interest. Fortunately, there is a benefit of modern society, most urban people have a basic old-age security, which for us today, people have a very good social system.

addition to material on the outside, in a sense that parents are like a child, he only needs the support of our material, we also need spiritual companionship. Is not it? The spirit of the Buddha can be independent, Zoran world.

However, most people are inseparable from the spiritual companionship. As an ordinary person, his presence requires a lot of support, especially in spiritual care. Your pet, just for him, he was not satisfied. If it is a dog, keep the edge in the swing of your tail and you want to do some physical contact. You touch it, he will feel very comfortable, you tease him play,bailey UGG boots, he will feel very happy! Moreover, our people? Spiritual communication, explore some of life, communication about everyday life, it is necessary.

exchange, not to say that what I have to pay for him. I understand that there is a continuation of the needs of parents, he wants you mature, I hope you grow up, you let him see in you a constant progress, improvement and growth.

However, the increase and growth in China may be materialized, and some parents will not be too concerned about the child's understanding and experience of life. He will pay attention to your cash on the card is not raised, your business card title is not in the upgrade, your husband or your wife will have a lot of material and some of the same conditions. This actually makes him feel that he has been in a passive request, very stressful.

but not all parents are such a request child. We also see a lot of parents and children is more of a friend type of companionship, sharing their experience of life. So he can raise a child to accompany a good social adaptability and the ability to create positive, it makes sense! Parents grew up in a timely manner if you can give them some encouragement and companionship recognition, such a child, his initiative and creativity will be very strong.

we may not be easy to do, we give children from small to large draw a circle, draw a box, and asked him to do it in the inside. Not to mention a person in the animal will be very troublesome. Done such an experiment, put a donkey pulling chains of Use, in his very young, probably still not learned to run, let his activities within a radius of three meters, but after a year later to his chains removed, this donkey has always refused to run out of three meters away.

have this possibility? Yes! May also feel that our own possibilities in such a. Sometimes I will think about it, our lives Why do some children to desperately escape from their parents, while he went to school, while he married, when all the way out here away from their parents This is because when he was living with their parents, feel are tied. That said, when I do not fully support parents talk about, I also talk about how parents treat children. Why do I complain, my parents are not too tight on my hands, huh, huh! There may be a little!

course, I think this is, you have to respect the separate existence of his life, but as parents our children have to respect the choice and needs. You think, ah! We will not only foster parents themselves, but also the hearts of parents. Yesterday I saw a report that China is now in the single or divorced elderly remarriage, can understand this phrase?

I will be concerned about such a question, in fact, this is a very real problem. I see a data center in China is now the elderly, single and divorced people very much, about three or four million people.

these, remarried in need there? You know what? This of course is still open, and some may still have the idea, hard to say, there may be various reasons for it! Probably no less than millions. Many of these people ah! They have no need, of course, there is a need, they have physical needs, emotional needs, which is the need to address one thing. However, their children can not accept, they find a lot of reasons,cheap UGG boots, such as: are we afraid of you cheated ah! Many people say that you have been cheated out how to do? Conditions are not bad even though we do not need you, but afraid you have been cheated.

there? Yes! But you really looked back from that? From a psychological point of view analysis, when we put our parents as a child, we feel that his inability to handle such a thing in his life. We arranged to give him! Another is I want to be worthy of my dead father and mother, should I be loyal to father and mother live. For your loyalty, your mom and dad to carry a heavy arch, whether male or female.

is not it? In fact, the idea that I have, I had a thought, if my father go first, I never allow my mother remarried. Oh ... ... really! This may be our idea in China, we can not accept that ordinary reality, and the Chinese people might accept their father married a woman come back, said his mother married, I have no mother. The mother is my life, a very important link. Is not it? But we thought that the elderly do not, of course, is one level. I just extended it to such a topic.

In fact, we really respect a man? Respect him as a life free? How independent? No! In fact, we do so, we put (him) her as a part of us, and I give him (her) to arrange for him (her) life.

Similarly, treatment of children, we must give him a good design, from birth gave him good design. My child to become a kind of person, until the hour of our death, we die, we still think: The son) said:

We always ask people, of course, I do not mean indulgence, but rather that we sometimes because of excessive demands on others, and did not reflect a mutual support and companionship, and let us brings more pain.

life this way, how to support parents? The one hand, respect for parents, acceptance and inclusion, the same as a parent of a child as well. But sometimes, life is a cycle, you find it? If he was a man there in his parents did not get a good education, he can hardly play a successful parents. Once we have tea as something to do an exchange, there is a thirty-year-old woman, she said: , piracy, copy.

we all ask ourselves, close your eyes, how much of my body where my parents a copy? That's it? I think there are many ways a person dealing with life, there are many of them are come from experience. Teachers from their own mother and father there to. Not to say that is bad, the middle of some of these can actually be adjusted. He is not absolute, but also a change of environment may not be practical, our language, attitude, look.

so in saying this, we can see that as a child how to support parents, and just said is the same, one is lack of material so that they do not do some things that make them happy, There is not something we encounter against the wishes of parents. But this am in a dilemma, parents let you do things that are not happy how to do? This is not absolute, you can communicate with them, this is just a principle.

in China, such a culture, in addition to the heart of parents, but also the wisdom of parents. That must let parents raise their own to do some things, of course, some parents there is no problem in itself, and some parents to the later years of their lives there is no requirement that Hunhundundun day.

I used to live in a neighborhood where I used to see some miserable livelihood of the elderly, such as 60-year-old retreat down, because now there are buildings in the city are living in a small house nest where every day is off, and accompany them is a TV, or else it is down the walk, two eyes straight, met from time to time to hear around the district where the mother has a lock na blowing kisses, and went one morning to hear ... ... Pharaoh is gone, talk of the town is gone, Mr. Chang went, hear a heart to twist every time. Otherwise, in order to avoid this, in the community recreation room to play mahjong, and in this way every day life, looking for some sustenance, he had nothing happy.

I also saw some old man, he was very pleasant to live, for example, in the West Garden Temple, I saw the garden in the West, some elderly, they dress very morning to the spirit of boxing . We can feel their mental state is not the same. If there is some good old amateur again nearly good, sometimes writing ah! Copy copy by ah! Read books ah! Drawing painting ah! Also and older choir, which is good, can make people feel good!

best if it, and come to us to participate in our retreats. The best! Sambo faith, so life there is a dependent, then the best! Because he is now very safe, clear the truth, all the time he was there a way that they have initiative.

but you can see in fact very difficult ah! Do not say we are old-age, we now have every aspect of the problem, you rely on the system all right, on the state to solve, impossible! Short period of time, you have six or seven years old these old people now, twenty years is not easy to achieve, you are their waiting for him, might as well give their own make some adjustments, this is everyone's blessings and karma, and able to adjust to meet the Dharma.

, of course, we are not only ask children for their parents work. Parents have a responsibility to the children, the elderly must not Yilaomailao. As I also ah! You looked me in the temple, also more than a decade. Sangha and the community does not like the ah, from the perspective of the Sangha, monks and nuns the longer you are old, and I knew, it is not very old, but also as relatively old, and veteran of the. You can not say that they veteran, and people just arrived this year, you asked people how and how, this is both. They gave us some, we have to give them some, in both directions.

As parents, we want to educate a child how to love a child, let a child grow up healthy and happy then? First of all, to love reading his son, this is normal! There is no isolated phenomenon, there is, but very few! There is no lack of material, economic pressure not to. Then the same as the Chinese traditional concept, to give him an agreeable companion to find.

I want this place to understand how do we do? Not to say that parents arranged, but that as a life experience after his parents, he knew his children and his character traits of a family background, he knows how and what kind of background exposure, we are an analogy, the two individual's cultural background, habits, and level of education, if the gap is too large, you say they can live together? Impossible, I would like to develop into an emotionally difficult for them. The so-called emotion, a relationship is to find a different self. If the difference between himself and the other too much, two people can not be together, absolutely impossible!

there, the last point is the inheritance. As parents of an inheritance. I think not only of property, the key is spirit. As a parent, how do we let children be a good education? What is a good education? Sometimes I also think, now, if you want to be some good education, you have to have a very superior economic strength. Otherwise, your child can not be in a good school district, an excellent school, with some so-called elite together.

indeed, seems to be like this! States would also like a lot of ways to adjust, but it seems there are some not successful. But I think this certainly has his advantages of education, but we have to think that he is not single. We can not give their children a good space, give him full freedom, let him go thinking, or we do not impose our ideas in the child's body, wanted him to be the person we can not do, and we through him to achieve their life satisfaction and ideals. Possible? !

may ah! I have a relative, and he did by a good education, middle school, but they have some accumulation of business later, want children to be good education, so this did not particularly high IQ, not love studying children to be sent to a bilingual school learning. In the early 90s the school was just fine, but the child can not adapt to this boarding school-based management and human relations. He made a lot of time in school mistakes, the school gave him the boot. Until today, he is not easy to deal with such a relationship, doing nothing all day, but fortunately he has a what is good, he has parental care, the economy is also no pressure.

In fact, this sort of thing commonplace, we see parents give children to create favorable conditions, but we also need to give him a life of learning, which I think is very important! Maybe he can not be a very good person, but at least he will not be a very bad person. Here I think of that whole era and society of our problems.

education abroad, we see that those children are learning very easy, very relaxed, and their IQ is not worse than we, their creativity than we do, from this consideration, we can and our children to share some more fun in life. Do not let the pain they feel very, very much pressure.

because the world itself has a lot of trouble, trouble, and you give your children growing up does not leave some good memories, that you let him grow up, would he think that he would think I came to this world is to suffer, to the suffering.

Recall that in our childhood, we some good memories? Anything else? Some please raise your hands, do not raise their hands, elderly people your age are not likely to have, and how some people you are going, there is also good and bad, right? Is not it? That pain and happiness!

Ha ha! Yes ah! Then we who bear the responsibility for it? Sometimes we blame society, then we find a reasonable reason. Sometimes complain that parents, my parents did not use, why they are not leaders, not the U.S. president. Ha ha! We always put his rationalization.

actually does not it! We think so, when we have done all our efforts, let us rejoice with each other, we will not regret it! Right ah? ! You can not ask a lot! During his environment, you can do the best on it!

Today I would like to share is the Dharma for the relationship between people and a view.

First of all, we need to know that Buddhism is very concerned about the relationship between man and man, and can say that Buddhism is to deal with the relationship between body and mind, as well as the relationship between people, between man and nature. The relationship between man and man is the most important, thus extending a lot of relationships.

So, when we deal with the relationship between a good time, in a sense you will easily make you a good quality of life improvement, and this relationship in the future, you will not encounter confusion, trouble. You can easily build healthy relationships with others.

understand? You can easily know what you are in a relationship, understand! We sometimes do not know how to get along with others, do not know how to treat themselves and should treat others, this is a very troublesome thing!

So some people say, I can not find myself, I do not believe that others, such things slowly emerged. In fact, I am also to share some of my experiences, down you have any good ideas you can tell me, so we are in relationship to each other to share and improve growth.

I think this is very important that we study Buddhism point increase in the relationship, in growing up on the development of a healthy relationship, it is returned to the theme of our talk today:
  public Synergy, get a good luck and happy life.